The one-two punch of drinking coffee after dinner (dumb) and some pretty junky stuff at work (annoying) have led to a truly brutal night. So I’m rocking about five hours of sleep right now, and looking at a full day due to a pretty big volunteer responsibility this afternoon.
Have you ever signed on for something because it needed to be done, and regretted it? That’s where I’m at. A big, tedious chunk of volunteerism that I just don’t want to do. But needed doing. And nobody else was doing it.
I can feel some fraying around the edges when it comes to the volunteer work these days. Not that I don’t like doing it, but frustration at other people for not stepping up. Which… it’s hard to figure out what’s fair to feel. Everyone’s got their own lives. They’ve got their own stresses. But at least as far as the radio stuff goes, it feels like there’s dozens of people who are only in it for the fun bit, and about eight that are really there to do the work. I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t frustrating.
What to do about that is something else entirely. I’m not sure there is anything. I can control my own volunteerism, and the volunteers, collectively, get the organization they deserve. So if I have to dial back for my own mental health, and nobody else steps up… that’s not really on me. I’ve done my bit.
A few fantasies over the last few days of taking six months of doing nothing — no courses, no volunteer work. Just my job and goofing off, watching movies, playing games. Probably worth investigating.