Day 474: The Uses of Downtime

I feel like I’m on the journey back up from the Valley of Meh — fingers are crossed but I’m not trying to get overconfident.

As mentioned previously and often, I’m on a track where I’m knocking out a few pretty major volunteer things right now. One is pretty much done, the other is an ongoing project that’ll take me into the summer and possibly beyond.

It’s all good, and it’s nice to see thing moving in an arc that ends with me able to try some new things by, ideally, midsummer. Hard to guarantee these things for myself, obviously, but good to think that I might have those opportunities.

One of the benefits of a week or so of feeling run down is I’ve committed, with my wife, to getting out of town. Just for day trips here and there in the summer, but it’s a smart move and I’m glad I’m doing it. I think changes of scenery are good, and if we can’t afford the time or money for a “real” vacation, quick escapes are the next best thing.

I hope I’m pretty much through this cyclical bout of downtime, but it does have its uses. I’m really re-evaluating what I want and don’t want to do from a more honest place than I can when I’m feeling up. Looking at what you’ve committed to and what you really feel committed to is something that has to be done at an ebb, because when you’re in flow, everything just feels like it’s doable and great.


Day 473: Staying Focused

It’s been challenging to stay on track this week — in fact, I think I can assert that I’ve been off-track with food, more or less okay with exercise. Sobriety has kind of gotten into my bones: I’ve been having a pretty flat/low week emotionally, but I haven’t even thought about drinking. It’s just coming up now because I was mentally running through the four pillars of exercise, food, sobriety and sleep.

It’s good to remind myself that this is periodic and cyclical, and one of the costs of being “up” and energetic most of the time is that I do hit these lulls.  It’s also kind of comforting to remember that. I don’t recall the last time I hit this kind of blah period — I feel like it was last November/December — but if the price to pay for being, well, me most of the time is being a little bit of a reduced me for a week or so periodically, I’m happy to pay it.

I’m choosing to look at this as a “charge cycle” rather than “something is wrong.” I run at 110% a lot of the time — I think I overachieve as a routine thing — so periodic drops down to, I don’t know, 60-70% are probably necessary.

At any rate, I’m in “ride this out” mode. Exercise was good this morning, and I’m feeling I think a little less meh than yesterday, so hopefully I’m turning the corner on this thing.

50% “ride it out,” 50% “fake it til you make it” — method acting also helps. If I can make myself act cheerful, I usually wind up feeling a bit more cheerful as well. So I’m’a grab a cup of joe and head briskly to work — seeming upbeat is often the key to feeling more upbeat.


Day 374: Get back on the checklist!

All right, I really like No Man’s Sky. But I need to actually, you know, back off it for a while. I’ve shortchanged my scheduled stuff for two nights to squeeze in a little more NMS. I’ve also been slack on the ol’ evening checklist.

So a minor course correction today, just pulling everything back onto track while it’s still more or less on track.

I ran into an interesting Reddit group a while back — 90 Days Goal. It’s a group-motivation thing that works in 90-day blocks, divided into “sprints” and “breaks”. I’m too far into January to get on board this time, but I like the idea… I like the “sprint” idea, and pushing the “scheduling and diet” thing for the rest of the month as a sprint makes sense to me.

So back on track today: check the schedule, stick to the schedule. Main issue there is I generally am wiped after work, so I’m tired in the evening and frankly don’t feel like More Stuff.

That’s the issue I really need to look at, I guess — reinvigorating for an evening of “work” after a day of work.