Day 867: Parents! (Day 5 of 100)

It’s pretty inspiring having my parents here: 50+ years of marriage, both in their 70s but in fine fettle, having spent a life of good diet and reasonably active lifestyles — and luck.

You can’t plan for bad luck, but you can optimize your chances for good luck, which is what they’ve done. It’s great to see them both well and together in their seventh decades.

Earlier on, I was knocking on about motivation, and it’s true — “productive vanity” is kind of my underlying thing, for good or for ill.

This is a motivator, though, seeing them well at their age. The long game. I’m not always good at focusing on that, but it’s good to have an example I can’t refute right in front of me.

Day 608: New Niece!

It’s been an interesting week, and one of the great things to come out of it is a new niece!

My sister and her family are trans-Atlantic, so it’s not likely I’ll get to see the wee bairn for a while. But WhatsApp and the Internet make it easy to stay connected, so I’m looking forward to keeping up with a new family member long-distance.

It kind of puts things in perspective, a bit. My wife and I aren’t on the kid track, which is a good choice for us, but it’s good to have kids in one’s life.

Day 556: Derailments

Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans, like the guy said. Yesterday, as covered, was a bit of a dramatic clustermug. Some short-term solutions but no long-term solutions, and we’re dealing with a situation that’s been handed off to us and seems to be the result of a shocking lack of long-range planning.

This is all sudden, and surprising, and has thrown off some of the meticulously tracked goals that I’ve set up for the quarter. But that’s okay. Nothing is really acutely time-sensitive with my stuff, so hitting “pause” on my projects to invest in long-term health and stability in the family is obviously the right move.

Finance doesn’t come up a lot here, because I’m not comfortable talking money. I don’t think most people are. But it’s super important, and if we’re talking about a project to improve health and happiness, you gotta talk stress. And if you’re going to talk stress, for 99% of us, ultimately you’re gonna talk money.

Not that I’m talking money today. But extended family issues have brought financial planning and sound decision-making back into sharp relief. So we’re thinking about money a lot right now. This is, again, eating into other plans, but ultimately it’s a good disruption because it’s drawing attention to a problem that will have a long-term negative impact. Goals like “improve this podcast” are deeply satisfying and may have benefits in the long term. But figure out your stuff for the long term is a goal that will definitely have benefits in the long term.

So — disruption is happening. It’s stressful. It’s anxiety inducing. But it’s ultimately really good.

 

Day 555: Family Business

It’s good to be well married.

Things happen; and we’re definitely in a things are happening moment right now. But I think it’s been a good case study in communicating and coping: in this household we’ve been having some frank and sometimes difficult conversations about our finances and families.

We’re fine, in case anybody is worried. There’s some ultimately solveable problems in the extended family, and we’re going to solve those problems. The important thing is we’ve been talking it out and working toward a consensus in our house before we look outward.

It’s not the calmest seas ahead, but much more navigable when you’ve got two co-captains who are charting the course together. Is that a good metaphor? Let’s pretend it’s a good metaphor.