Day 756: Slight stray from the Path

Yesterday got away from me a bit — our lunch plans were derailed, which led to a kind of improvised afternoon/evening, and then some extra unplanned snacking. Popcorn and nuts, which isn’t exactly devouring a bag of chips or whatnot, but still.

Up early with nightmares (and cats), so this morning’s off to a weird start as well, and also with some low-willpower nut snacking. I’ll have to loop back and be honest in the calories for yesterday and so far today.

I’m going to open my spreadsheet for positive reinforcement — those graphs showing the downward trend really help — and regroup for the rest of the day.

It’s interesting that it’s not really a mindful act to stray; the best description I have is a tight self-justification loop, but that’s embedded in a certain kind of impulsive mindlessness. It’s a bit hard to describe, but if you can imagine a small cog of “whatever, you need this” spinning inside a much larger haze of not really thinking too much, that’s how I end up straying.

I think that’s one of the things about the water drinking that really helps, especially first thing (which I didn’t do this morning): it forces me into being awake and mindful. “Drifting” is the dangerous thing.